21 days till Christmas, and I don't think I will make it this time. I have armored myself to the unending Christmas music in Wal Mart beginning sometime in September. I just remind myself that the worker bees have no recourse, so it could be worse.
The U-Can Share food drive on Channel 11 news has made me resort to watching re-runs of Saved by the Bell at 10:00. Those I can adjust to.
It is the onslaught of Christmas commercials that even my vintage Betamax can't escape.
If Rudolph is sick, is the Aflac duck REALLY going to guide Santa's sleigh? How many people are actually buying these curvy looking diamond pendants that every seller seems to be pushing? And, honestly I don't give a fuck if he went to Jerod's! But the worst are these goddamn Lexus and Lincoln commercials. Who in the hell is giving someone a fucking Lexus for Christmas? And, what kind of gay man wants a goddamn Lincoln instead of power tools? How much are these dipshits spending to target the 12 people in the country that can afford to give these kind of gifts? Every time the wife looks at me after one of the ads. I dangle her keys in front of her and say..."Enjoy your minivan darlin'!"
Sweet Jesus, in defense of your birthday, please make it stop and bring back Santa riding the Norelco razor down the snowy slope.
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You have to admit, though... the Staples commercial where the baby causes holiday havoc by repeatedly pressing the easy button is hysterical.
J did an interview this morning on KLBK-13's morning show, showing off "what's hot" in electronic gifts this year. He was on right after Wade Wilkes did his daily TV station call-in, which made me think of you...
maybe this will help ...
xmas spirit
Or perhaps this...
yuletide cheer
Thanks Al...
Jeeez Tammy...my eyes, my God my eyes!
Ah good, you got better in time to enjoy the holidays properly. Grand. Maybe you'll meet your pups under the mistletoe...
I'm evil aren't I. Though it's better than where I left you in the previous post, being kissed with barf breath while toilet water dripped from their chins.
Merry Christmas!
Yes, Billyfish, only 17 more days now... unless you watch Adult Swim... they've come up with an ingenious ides. They have begun counting for the next Christmas... instead of the 12 days of Christmas, Adult Swim is promoting the the 388 days of Christmas... and well, it makes sense. Just think of all things you buy with over a year of planning! Oh, the parties you could attend -- and throw!!
I have to admit though, I had kind of pegged you as Christmas person, till now.
Sorry for being late to the party but I have to share my thoughts:
I miss Santa riding the Norelco shaver. There is no way that the AFLAC Duck would replace Rudolph because Don Pickering would shoot him. The car commercials are a beating. I do like the Home Depot commercial that has the family in the front yard and Santa left Dad a TABLE SAW.
BTW will you be available to make BM's on 1/1/08?
BM= not bowel movements.
Ah, Batman's legendary BM's.
Sorry to intrude, Batman. I saw a link to your site through Cousin Ed's Blog and just had to click. What kind of guy can resist clicking buttons? I don't know, and quite honestly I'm not sure I want to know him.
Anyway, your posting had me in stitches. I'm totally with you on the Lexas/Lincoln/Cadillac Escalade commercials. My wife looked at me after one of them and asked if I would buy her a new car like that. "Sure," I said. "Once I sell my first novel and I make a butt-load of money, I might do that. Until then ... no."
Welcome Stephen...
I hope to get in the mood for further posting soon. I am not sure if I am uninspired, or if nothing has pissed me off, but I just don't have a lot to say lately.
Taxes are looming, and that will get me going.
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