Persimmon...The Titanium of The Future

With the Club Championship looming on the horizon (July 11-13th) I have been trying to get out and tune up the golf game whenever I get a chance. Friday, I snuck out of work and played a round with Damian and a buddy of his. Front nine, I was out of my mind and shot six pars and 3 bogeys for a 39. Easily the best nine holes I have played in a long time save for the 38 I shot at Lakeridge a couple of weeks ago. The problem lies in the other 9 holes. Damian popped off and stated I would probably shoot a 49 on the back, and that is exactly what happened.

The problem with shooting 39 on the front is you begin to believe you are a good golfer, and the specter of breaking 80 jumps to the front of your mind. As I have only broken 80 twice in my life...it is hard to resist the urge to look ahead.

All was holding together until the 13th hole, when I found myself in the trees with no escape, and only bad luck following me. I managed to escape with a double bogey and was 7 over par at that point. Meaning, I had five holes to go, and would now have to par all five to break 80. To put it mildly, I was a little upset with myself for putting myself in that situation.

I teed up the ball on 14 and pulled out the new 3-wood I had gotten for Christmas to hit a very easy tee shot onto a fairly simple par 4. I drew back, and completely missed the ball on my swing. This means, that although the ball never moved, I still have to count the stroke. Blood pressure is rising as I take another swing. I almost completely miss the ball again, and bounce it lazily just off the end of the tee box. Golf etiquette dictates that one must throw the club of choice at this point. As I had the new 3-wood in my hands, it became the club of choice. There was a sickening sound of graphite snapping as the head of the club parted ways with the shaft. Isn't that nice...now I will be out $50 or $60 to get the club repaired, in addition to pissing away a good round. The potential sub 80 became an 88 by the time it was all over.

Even worse, now as I prepare for the club championship, I will have to rely on the old, dusty persimmon wooden 3-wood for the duration. On a good note, I went out today with said club, and shot 84. Perhaps persimmon will prove to be the technology of the future after all.

The New American Taliban

Tonight, I can relate to the plight of the Taliban. I too, now hate America. I watched the opening episode of "America's Got Talent" for 15 horrific minutes, and I can understand now why they hate America. Is this truly what the majority of Americans consider entertainment now? I am not talking about you faithful readers. You have proven your superior intellect (at least when compared to the American average) with your various postings and remarks.

Good Lord, save us all! This was the first time in many years I have strayed far enough away from the History Channel and Discovery during prime time to get a taste of what's considered mainstream. That had to be the most painful 15 minutes of TV I have watched in lo these 49 years.

Last nights radio again spoke of the total absence of sunspot activity for the past three months, and I was reminded that according to the Mayan calendar, the world will cease to exist in 2012. The best I can figure is, it takes about four years for the Sun to burn out once it begins to run out of fuel. After tonight's experience, the darkness cannot come to soon for me!

Allah Akbar, brothers and sisters.

D-Day & Private Ryan

Every year, on June 6th, I try to make a point of watching Saving Private Ryan. This film helps me remember the sheer hell a lot of young men went through 64 years ago in an effort to preserve freedom for the rest of the world. The opening 20 minutes of D-Day footage should be required viewing for everyone under the age of 50. It will help you stop bitching about the bullshit going on at work, and the current run up in the price of gas. You don't have to watch the entire film...just the invasion footage. Life is good...and things could be a lot worse.

Thank you for your sacrifices, young men. Rest in peace...