Stimulus, Stimuli, Stimulata

I enjoyed another great Fourth Up North celebration on Friday. Good friends, good weather and good fireworks. Although it takes a lot of work, it is worth it, and I always end up having a great time. The wife and I set a benchmark this year, by making it through the entire operation with no arguments or angry words. Friday was followed by two days in the Emerald Cathedral pursuing my passion for breaking graphite shafts. I can't think of a better way to spend a three day weekend.

But wait...what is this in my mailbox today? Why, it is a $1200 Economic Stimulus check from my benevolent nannies in Congress. Why, this weekend just keeps getting better and better. After all, what better way to celebrate the proposition that all men are created equal than to accept some money taken from the wealthy taxpayers in this country and redistributed to those of us less fortunate.

Thank you, wealthy taxpayers. In your honor, I will do my part as a good American and get to some stimulatin'! Hopefully, you will own stock in some of the companies I intend to stimulate. Thus your share value and dividends will increase, causing you to pay more tax next year, resulting in an even larger redistribu...oooops, I mean stimulus, check next year. Oh, I forgot. There is not an election in 2009, so the nannies will not be making any such generous offering.

At any rate, I do intend to pump this money right back into the economy immediately. The wife will be purchasing what must be her 15th digital camera. And I, after a serious upbraiding by Shoeless, shall be custom fit for new golf clubs this week. As I am sure this was all that was wrong with my game, look for me on the Tour next year. Oh crap...that will make me wealthy...there goes my next stimulus check.